Today is my birthday, but I’m not posting this so that you leave me “happy birthday” comments. That’s what Facebook is for.

No, instead, I’m going to- I’m going to let down the gate for a moment and talk about a birthday memory from long ago that really changed things for me, and in a certain way, really shaped the kind of person I turned out to be. It’s not a sad moment, by any means, but it kind of reshaped what a birthday could be for me at an age where I may not have been ready for this redefinition.

When I started this blog I intended for it to serve as a vehicle for my comedy writing; not my personal life. Today, however, is my birthday, so I ask you to bear with me. If you don’t want to get all… involved in my past, I understand. So if that describes you, I’ll put this birthday memory behind a cut tag, and you can click it only if you feel curious.

When I turned eight my mom made me a Nickelodeon Magazine slime cake.

It looked like this: